How NOT to compliment yourself

So, I was talking with a friend today and she related the following 100% true story.

I'm looking for clever comebacks, so PLEASE leave a comment on what you wish my friend would have said.

A couple of years ago, this friend, who we'll call Mary, lost weight and was a size 4, which was way too small for her frame.  She is almost 41 years old and about 5'7".  She has since gained some weight but by no means would be considered fat.  She has naturally curly/wavy hair, of which I am always jealous.  She is also one of the most professionally groomed people I know.  Mary is in mid-level management at the company at which she works.  So, that's the important information you need to know about Mary's background to understand her experience.

Mary has a co-worker, who we will call Sally, who is about 55 and could be considered, by all accounts I've heard, a hoochie.  She wears 5-inch stilettos almost every day.  Her skirts are on the tighter side and cover almost everything that should be covered to keep her out of jail.  She is an executive at the company at which Mary and Sally work and frequently meets with current and potential clients.  So, there's Sally's background.

Mary went to the ladies room and as she exited a stall and started washing her hands, Sally, who was standing at the mirror, started "smoothing" her skirt.  She said, to no one in particular, "Oooo!  My butt looks a little big today."  She then primped her hair and remarked, "And my hair!  It's looking frizzy!" Mary said nothing as she continued to wash her hands, preparing to go back to work.

And then it came.

Sally said, "Well, you certainly look comfortable with yourself these days."  And walked out.

I.KNOW...RUDE!

So, dear readers.  This is where we need your input.

First, please let us know what you would have said or done in real life.

And then, let us know what you wish Mary had said or done.

I'm still too stunned to even formulate a response.